Advice for My Daughter

Category: Work

  • Climb the Steepest Mountain

    Climb the Steepest Mountain

    There are times in life when you are tired and you want to go for a leisurely walk. You want to relax and take in the scenery and just enjoy the moment.

    There are other times when you need to strive to be the very best you.

    During these times, I encourage you not to take the leisurely path, but to find the steepest mountain you can climb, and get moving.

    This image perfectly demonstrates that risks and reward associated with different paths.

    Path 1:

    Path one offers a good climb. You’ll put in work, get a little winded, and end up at a higher point than when you started. It will offer some challenges, but for the most part, it’s not going to be very difficult for you. You hike to the top, meeting quite a few people on the way who are doing the same, and you’ll get a nice view.

    Path 2:

    Path two is hard. It will require a lot of preparation, be littered with challenges and risks, and you’ll be going it alone. You’ll be going to a place that very few dare to go. But when you reach the top, you will have done things that few people have done and see things that few people have ever seen.

    I challenge you to take the second path at least a few times in your life.

    You can set your sights on a comfy desk job where you can make a decent living, get a few weeks of vacation, and work your way up the corporate ladder. When you reach the top of that ladder, the views will be pretty good, but you will ultimately feel less than exhilarated.

    Or you can walk a little further and climb up the bigger mountain. You aren’t prepared to climb it. You never will be. It’s just one of those mountains that you have to figure out as you go. There is no straight path up this mountain because nobody else has gone here before. The path is winding, but not aimless. You determine the path because nobody else has worn one down for you. You are on new ground.

    This mountain forces you to learn your own personal strengths and weaknesses. It forces you to be creative. It can also take a very, very long time to reach the top

    The steeper the incline, the higher the summit, and my goodness, the views are spectacular.

    Rather than focusing on a destination, focus on a path. The steeper the incline, the more challenging the learning curve, the more you get that nervous pit in your stomach, the more you KNOW that the view at the summit will be amazing.

    Your life doesn’t need to be filled with Matterhorn’s and Everest’s, but it also doesn’t need to be one long, boring stroll either. Mix it up. Strap in for a rough ride. Go to sleep exhausted because you learned so much. Forge your own path rather than always walking the well one, blindly following the footprints of someone else who has been here before.

    And when you get to the top, pull out your phone and snap a photo that nobody else has ever snapped.

    Commit to the struggle so you can bask in the sunshine at the top. The views up here are absolutely spectacular.

    Climb on.

    Photo by Dylan Siebelink on Unsplash

  • Quitters Sometimes Win. Winners Sometimes Quit.

    Quitters Sometimes Win. Winners Sometimes Quit.

    We’ve all heard the saying a million times that “Quitters never win and winners never quit.”

    It’s not true.

    Strategic quitting is the only way that you can achieve what really matters in your life.

    In her book, The Sweet Spot, Christine Carter writes,

    “Not all mountains are worth climbing all the way to the top, especially if the costs of doing so are great. Sometimes the greatest cost comes from climbing the mountain to the top, only to look longingly down at another path you’ll always wished you’d followed.”

    We can’t follow every path all the way to the top. We need to be selective.

    When I started college, my major was accounting. After one year, it became clear to me that I didn’t have a passion for it, so I quit my major and selected a new one that aligned with my need to be creative.

    When I started writing, I had four different blogs about different subjects. Maintaining them all was impossible and trying to do so was a prescription for failure across the board. So I quit most of them so I could focus intensely on one.

    I’ve quit jobs, friends, relationships, sports and organizations. I no longer wanted to climb those mountains.

    Quitting isn’t just about saying no to something. It’s about saying yes to something else.

    So let’s reframe quitting:

    I’ve quit jobs so I could say yes to work that aligned with my values.

    I’ve quit friends who didn’t bring joy to my life so that I could spend more time with the people who meant the most to me.

    I’ve quit relationships so I could respect myself.

    I’ve quit sports when they stopped being a source of fulfillment so I could focus harder on the activities I was passionate about.

    I’ve quit organizations when I was spread too thin, so I would have more time to dedicate to those of the highest importance.

    Once you realize that you are climbing the wrong mountain, it’s ok to stop. And honestly, the sooner you do, the sooner you can reverse your path and get climbing the mountain that really matters to you.

    We each have 24 hours in a day. That’s it. Use them wisely and quit when necessary.

    Stop reading books that aren’t compelling. Say goodbye to toxic relationships. Don’t finish everything on your plate if you are full. Stop taking dance classes when you discover that you enjoy acting more. Stop doing things just because “quitters never win.”

    Quit wisely and quit often because sometimes those that don’t quit are the ones who lose the most.

     

    Photo credit:
    Caroline Hernandez

  • Work Hard Regardless of What You Are Being Paid

    Work Hard Regardless of What You Are Being Paid

     

    Working is part of life. Whether you are a stay-at-home mom, the owner of start-up, a store clerk, a CEO, or a volunteer…work hard.

    It’s called a work “ethic” because it’s value based. You work hard…at every job…every time…because it’s who you are.

    I was working at a large bookstore chain and was always surprised when I would come in and some of my co-workers had left stacks of books for me to re-shelve. I wasn’t upset, because I enjoyed shelving them, but I was curious as to why they preferred to do nothing rather than do something, so I asked why they made that choice.

    The response: “I don’t get paid enough to work hard.”

    And chances are, they never will get paid enough. Work hard first. Get paid later.

    There is a quote that says “You can’t make a million dollars with a minimum wage work ethic.”

    If you are making $8 an hour you should work as if you are making $100. If you are making $100 an hour, you should work as if you are making $500. Always give more than is expected.

    There is something to be said about being the type of person that can be relied on. It feels good to go to bed at night exhausted from a hard day of work.

    Being bored is…well…boring.

    If you babysit and the kids are asleep, rather than sitting on the couch watching tv, why not take 20 minutes and wash the dishes in the sink? The parents will be shocked and you will be the first person they call the next time they need a babysitter.

    Fill up your time. Be of service.

    Work hard.

     

    Fill up your time. Be of service. Work hard. (tweet this)

     

     

     

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