Advice for My Daughter

Category: Determination

  • Expand Your Greatness Outward

    Expand Your Greatness Outward

    The term “ego” is often used when referring to someone who is self-centered or self-focused. There is, however, a different way of looking at it.

    The ego represents the self and how you distinguish yourself from other people. All of us are distinct and all of us have unique talents. I prefer to think of ego as “Expanding Greatness Outward.”

    Your talents are a gift. Don’t hide them. Don’t minimize them.

    Celebrate the abilities that you have been given by sharing them with others.

    Teach.

    If you write, write regularly so others can learn from you.

    If you are joyful, pick other people up when they are sad or lonely.

    If you are good at finances, help those who aren’t.

    If you know something that someone else doesn’t, tell them. Don’t squander your knowledge.

    And don’t ever, ever, ever hide your abilities.

    Discover what makes you unique and sprinkle a little bit of it everywhere you go. Honor your talents by sharing them with others.

    Expand your greatness outward.

  • Be Unmistakable

    Be Unmistakable

    Being unmistakable isn’t the same as being flashy or extroverted or the life of the party. It means to be one hundred percent you.

    Every. Single. Time.

    We are each created with our own blueprint and, yes, there is only one blueprint of you. There may be some imitations. Some people could attempt to copy and paste. There is, however, just one original.

    When you are your true self (flaws and all), you cannot be mistaken for anyone else.

    Be unmistakableBe creative.
    Be silly.
    Be clumsy.
    Be affectionate.
    Be very, very talkative.
    Be great at art.
    Be not as great at sports.
    Be giving.
    Be curious.
    Be disorganized.
    Be a good friend.
    Be besties with Grandma.
    Be a rock collector.
    Be a cheetah.
    Be friendly.
    Be a night owl.
    Be a risk taker.
    Be kind.
    Be passionate about what you love.
    Be ridiculous.
    Be you.

    Be unmistakable.

     

    Image by Niccolò Caranti

     

  • 6 Reasons to Celebrate Failure

    6 Reasons to Celebrate Failure

    Failure gets a bad rap. It’s the opposite of success, right? You either win or lose. It’s black or white.

    Not around here. We celebrate failure. This is why:

    Failure means that you tried something new

    If you are always doing things that you are great at, chances are you are not trying new things. You don’t jump on a bike and ride around the block right away. You fall down a few times (maybe more than a few times). Doing new things can be both scary and exciting. Try them anyway. You may find something that you hate or something that becomes a lifelong passion. Either way, try new things.

    Failure teaches you what you are doing wrong

    Mistakes provide you with information that leads you along a path to solve problems. If you are trying to write code, you try something, look a the website and see if what you did worked or if it didn’t. Each time you try something that doesn’t work, you have eliminated an option. You are getting closer to success. There is a great quote from Thomas Edison where he says, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Finding what doesn’t work gets you one step closer to what does.

    Failure breeds success

    People who fail are among the most successful. Why? Because failure makes you better. Successful people tend to have far more failures than successes, but we pay attention to the things they succeed at.

    “I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” – Michael Jordan.

    Take the shot. The thrill of succeeding far outshines the pain of the failures.

    Failure is a reality check

    It feels awful to fail at something. It’s frustrating and possibly even embarrassing. But it keeps us human and is a reminder that we are not better than anyone else. Everyone fails. Everyone. Failing teaches us that we are imperfect. All of us.

    Failure gives you focus

    There are an unlimited number of things that you can do in life. Imagine if you were exceptional at every single one of them. How would you choose? Failure helps us to eliminate the things that we are weaker at so that we can gift the world with our true talents. Find the things that you excel at and grow those abilities.

    Failure breeds community

    Since we are not great at everything, we are reliant upon the gifts of others to help us get through life. My lack of sewing skills provides the income for someone who is gifted in sewing. My weaknesses are someone else’s strengths. Together, we can be great at everything. Find people that you can gift your talents to and allow them to fill in for your weaknesses.

    Yes. In our home we celebrate failure. We get excited when you fall off your bike or decide that you don’t like soccer. Every time you fail, you are learning something about yourself and self discovery is definitely worth celebrating!

     

    Image by Tomasz Stasiuk

  • Work Hard Regardless of What You Are Being Paid

    Work Hard Regardless of What You Are Being Paid

     

    Working is part of life. Whether you are a stay-at-home mom, the owner of start-up, a store clerk, a CEO, or a volunteer…work hard.

    It’s called a work “ethic” because it’s value based. You work hard…at every job…every time…because it’s who you are.

    I was working at a large bookstore chain and was always surprised when I would come in and some of my co-workers had left stacks of books for me to re-shelve. I wasn’t upset, because I enjoyed shelving them, but I was curious as to why they preferred to do nothing rather than do something, so I asked why they made that choice.

    The response: “I don’t get paid enough to work hard.”

    And chances are, they never will get paid enough. Work hard first. Get paid later.

    There is a quote that says “You can’t make a million dollars with a minimum wage work ethic.”

    If you are making $8 an hour you should work as if you are making $100. If you are making $100 an hour, you should work as if you are making $500. Always give more than is expected.

    There is something to be said about being the type of person that can be relied on. It feels good to go to bed at night exhausted from a hard day of work.

    Being bored is…well…boring.

    If you babysit and the kids are asleep, rather than sitting on the couch watching tv, why not take 20 minutes and wash the dishes in the sink? The parents will be shocked and you will be the first person they call the next time they need a babysitter.

    Fill up your time. Be of service.

    Work hard.

     

    Fill up your time. Be of service. Work hard. (tweet this)

     

     

     

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  • I Can’t Do It…Yet

    I Can’t Do It…Yet

    It’s always ok to say “I can’t do it” as long as you take the extra two seconds to complete the sentence.

    I can’t do it, yet.

    Everything that you can do today, you couldn’t do 6 years ago. You couldn’t talk. You couldn’t chew. You couldn’t read. You couldn’t tell funny jokes. You couldn’t dance. You couldn’t do any of it….

    yet

    The “yet” is where the magic lives. The “yet” is where the possibility sits and where dreams come alive. The “yet” is where “who you are” transforms into “who you’ll become.”

    Don’t forget the yet.

    In our house, it’s not acceptable to say “I can’t do it.” It’s just not. Some things are hard. Some things are VERY hard. Some things may even be impossible. But we won’t know that until we work towards the yet.

    The amazing thing about yets is that you don’t know what all of them are…yet.

    Will you be good at playing guitar?

    Will you be a scientist?

    Will you make the most amazing cupcakes ever created?

    We don’t know. The answers are in the yet.

    The tricky thing about the yet is that it’s not a simple place to get to. You can’t just call Uber and and have them drive you to yet. You can’t plug “yet” into Google Maps. There is no shortcut to yet.

    But it’s out there. You just haven’t found it.

    yet

     

    Image by Lily Monster